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If you've gotten this, happy New Millennium. If all hell has broken loose, then I guess this Update will be read by the Star Beings who will find our planet many thousands of years hence.

I just finished webizing (is that a word?) my latest TapeOp article "RECORDINGS THAT CHANGED MY LIFE". This installment covers CAROLINER Rainbow Cooking Stove Beast, and the web page has Real Audio examples.

Appropriately, CUT OF THE MONTH the missing track from the Cooking Stove Beast LP, titled "Ann Terry's Fearful House Problem". How did I happen to acquire said "missing track," you wonder? Why, through audio wizardry, or course! Check it out.

Last month saw the completion of the new BLACK CAT ORCHESTRA CD (last month's Cut of the Month, you will recall, which is still up on the web if you haven't yet indulged in BCO's taste of old Europe).

ELIZABETH FALCONER was in to record Installment One of her children's stories. Liz has tapped in the story teller scene, and is presently adapting traditional Japanese children's tales with accompanying music on koto.

MEDIA MOGUL, INC. recorded the first of a series of radio conversations/lectures with doctors about various subjects as part of a contining education project. Sounds a bit boring, you say? Oh, noooo! The first show dealt with Hospice care and the changes occuring within, and the second show examined airborne chemicals and the effects they have on human health. Now, I'm not generally a fan of western medicine, but the conversations regarding airborne chemicals was truly fascinating, like something straight out of The Matrix (the conspiracy book, not the movie). I'll let you know when these go up on the web.

The GRAVELVOICE CORPORATE CHRISTMAS PARTY was a blast! It took place on December 21st (Winter Solstice and Frank Zappa's birthday). After our ritual gift exchange, the jamming did comence. About 10 minutes into the jam (which was going really well), JEFF TAYLOR looked up at the ceiling and slurred, "Wheresh'sha shmoke comma frum?!" We usually just ignore Jeff when he says stuff like that (it usually passes), but it turns our new board member JULIAN MARTLEW was playing so hot his middle speaker had burst in to flames! No pyrotechnic stage trick, this - he was using an Arp Axxe through a 10 watt Pathfinder tube PA amp into Shure PA columns (which we acquired from the Seattle Police Department), and I guess it just couldn't take it. In hindsight, the funniest part of it all was that we were so impaired we just stood around this leaping inferno in the middle of my studio saying "wow!" (ala lava lamp-tripping). Thankfully, SPENCER SUNDELL (our voice of reason, who we NEVER ignore!) shouted, "Someone get on it!" and tried to blow the flames out - another funny sight. JULIAN saved the day, though, by hustling the entire cabinet down the hall to a safe fire zone! Can't believe he wasn't burnt.

Good times, good times...